Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?

John and I are going to a wedding on Friday and I couldn't be more excited! I'm totally looking forward to seeing the bride and her family, who I have known since I was 8 and were an integral part of my life and my spiritual growth. There will be people there that I haven't seen in years as well as some of my dearest friends. Of course, it's also going to be a gorgeous and romantic event and I can't wait to see how the couple's personalities are reflected in the details of the wedding and both receptions.

My wedding day was the most incredible day of my life. I remember it like it was yesterday! I remember feeling so overwhelmed that there was this amazing guy standing in front of me who wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, and then there were 300 people all around me who came out to support us and show us how much they loved us. I cried harder than I have ever cried in my life during our first dance, simply because I was so overwhelmed with thankfulness for God's abundant blessings.

Recently, John and I have experienced some "bumps" in our marriage and while sharing these with a couple Christian girlfriends recently, I was amazed to find that I'm not alone in this. Although my friends and I love our husbands more than anything on earth and while we have all given our lives to Christ and are actively pursuing Him in every area of our lives, our marriages are not immune from experiencing problems. Last week, I picked up a book called Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas and have been amazed at the truths in it. Between the book and some amazing advice from an unbelievably sweet and caring Christian friend, I've come to realize that while I tend to point out all of the areas in which John can improve as a man and as a husband, I've REALLY missed the mark as a woman and as a wife. Instead of focusing on myself and the areas in which I need to improve, I've wasted all my time and energy focusing on the person I can't change, and he doesn't really deserve to be judged by his imperfect wife!

While praying about this last night, I had a thought that helped me to wrap my head around how I can change my focus, so I want to share it with you so that I can make more sense of it as I get it out in writing... I truly believe that we as girls really sabotage our marriage as soon as the engagement ring is put on our finger. How??? The wedding. How many weddings have you been to where it was all about the groom? How many reality shows are on TV that show Groom-zillas? How many magazines feature hundreds and hundreds of pages of tuxedos and cuff links and shiny black shoes? None, because we are told by everyone on earth that the wedding is all about the bride, and so we start planning for this day thinking that not only does this one amazing day revolve completely around us, but so does every day after the wedding. This amazing man who truly wants you to have a perfect wedding day (and who really doesn't care too much about the color of the flowers or the chair bows or whether or not the ribbon on the programs is thick enough) ends up being treated like a stagehand during the wedding planning and then after the wedding, this man who wants nothing more than to make you happy continues to be treated as a slave - someone whose only purpose is to keep you entertained, give you everything you want, not have too strong of an opinion about anything, and not argue when you ask for something - just like he was treated during the wedding planning. Now I am sure none of us would admit that we acted this way and maybe some of us gave our husbands a little more respect during the wedding planning, but I really believe that this theory still has some merit in most marriages.

I want my husband to know that no one respects him more than I do. I want him to be confident that I will follow him no matter where he asks me to go. I want him to never hesitate to share something with me out of fear of what my response will be. I want him to always choose me when there is a choice between being with me or doing something else, not out of obligation, but because he truly enjoys my company. I want him to be free to be himself and know that I am behind him, encouraging him to be exactly who God has created him to be. And I am sure that none of this will happen if I expect his whole world to revolve around me and my desires.

My prayer is that I will be so focused on my relationship with Christ and on my role as becoming a wife that treats her husband the way Jesus calls me to treat him that I can honestly say that I don't have the time or the energy or even the awareness to point out his shortcomings. I know it will be tempting to sneak a glance at what he could do better, but I know where that will take us, and I have no desire to live that way any longer!!! He gave me everything I asked for when we were planning our wedding - now it's my turn to bend to his desires as we share a life together!

Support Diabetes Research!

The Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation (JDRF) is the largest research & support organization for helping to find a cure for Diabetes and helping support those who live with Diabetes on a daily basis. My dear friend, Melissa, was diagnosed on April 1, 1997 and has participated in their "Walk To Cure Diabetes" for many years! I am walking this year to show my support for my friend and my family members who have Diabetes.

If you would like to support my sweet friend, you can do so by signing up to walk OR by giving a small donation :)

(Information about the walk location)

http://walk.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=walk.walk&eventID=4583&chapterid=4132

(To donate and/or register to walk with ELSWICK TEAM ROCKS)

http://walk.jdrf.org/walker.cfm?id=87302530

Thanks for anything you can do!!

Chickens, Inspired By...Chickens!!

When I saw "Kittens, Inspired By...Kittens!" I thought, "This is something my niece, Jordan, would do."

Well....

Great Quote

"Great leadership is not about making decisions on your own; its about owning the decision once it's been made." - Andy Stanley

What's Happening in Our Neck of the Woods

Life at the Orr house has been a little nuts lately - let me try to take you through what the past 2 weeks have been like for John and me...




2 weeks ago, my little girl Prissy laid her first egg. As crazy as this may sound and for those of you who know me well, it DOES sound a little crazy, but I was SO excited!! This was the primary selling point for us getting these 3 little pooping machines, and to finally have eggs is a really big deal at our house. These girls have done more than provide us with endless entertainment and fresh eggs everyday - as weird as it may sound, it's given John and I another common interest to talk about and enjoy. We love going outside and hanging out with the girls and I love giving John the daily update of what they've gotten into when he calls from his trips. I never thought that I'd be devoting this much time or energy to talking about chickens, but I guess anything is possible :)

On a side note, John's girl Georgia has also started laying - she had a nest hidden in our banana trees, and when John found it, there were over a dozen eggs stockpiled back there!! Of course, they were put in the trash - I'm not eating eggs that have been sitting outside for over a week!



For Valentine's Day, John and I were both in Atlanta and had a lovely dinner the night before at our favorite restaurant in Peachtree City, Georgia Shrimp Company. On the 14th, I was trying to fly home to Fort Lauderdale, but all of the flights were booked. Luckily, John was leaving that night on a 3-day trip that took him to Chicago, Orlando, Indianapolis, and had an overnight stop on Sunday night in FORT LAUDERDALE! All of his flights were open, so after a little shmoozing with the gate agent, I was booked on his flights for Saturday and Sunday and had the opportunity to watch him work. It was the first time I had been on a plane that he was flying - and it was so cool!!! I had to try really hard not to get cocky, (you all know what happened last time), but sitting in first class and "casually" mentioning to everyone around me that my husband was flying the plane was hard to resist!!



3 days after getting to fly around with John, I met him and his aunt's family at Disney for 3 days. The weather was perfect, the company was also perfect, and it was great to get some down time with my hubby. I came down with a killer cold the day before I left for DIsney, but it didn't stop me from having a great time!



Here's John with our super-cool Auntie Pam and cousin, Nat. We had such an amazing time - I can't wait to do it again!!!

My Valentine

Valentine's Day is this Saturday (hint, hint - you have a few days to make some incredible plans for the people you love) and I am looking forward to finding new ways this week to show John just how much I love him. I am pretty sure he always knows when I am frustrated or upset or in a bad mood, so I want to make extra sure he knows how much I love him this week.

In my humble opinion, John has it made on Valentine's Day. While most girls require a lot, I only ask for 2 things: 1) A card and 2) That we plan to go somewhere together and spend the day together. The card thing is a big deal - I love cards and, much to John's dismay, I spend about $30 a month on cards at the Hallmark store. When we were dating (and talking about getting married), John showed up at my house with a Valentine's Day card...it was the exact same card that my friend, Jenn, had given to me the year before. It said, "Valentine's Day is not just about romance..." Yeah, he started reading cards in the store before he bought them after that.

Our first married V-Day, we drew straws and I had to plan our day. We started the day with breakfast in bed, followed by lunch at the Harley store and an afternoon boat cruise on the Intercoastal. After the cruise, we grabbed ice cream on Las Olas and went home for an extra special home-cooked meal of steak and shrimp. Last year was John's turn, and I was sick as a dog!! Poor thing!! He made me a lovely dinner and cleaned the kitchen and took extra special care of me.

This year, we are going to be in Atlanta and my plan is to go to Stone Mountain - it is my favorite spot in Georgia!!!! I am still working on a couple of surprises for John - I have to go all out, not just because he is absolutely God's best for me, but because I have some serious competition!!!!


What do you have planned for Valentine's Day?? Whether you're single, dating, or married, it is a great opportunity to take a few minutes to show love to the people who mean the most to you! And if you're planning on buying a card, get to the Hallmark store tomorrow before all the good cards are gone!!!

Affirmation

Recently I have made some tough choices - today I was extremely pleased to receive affirmation that these have been some extremely wise and beneficial choices. As I used to tell my girls, the right thing to do is RARELY the easy thing to do - but I am so, so, so glad that I chose correctly!!!!!